The First Day of the Rest of My Life

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. How many of those do we get? Go to google and put in "The first day of the rest of my life" and click images. It's picture after picture of happy people, smiling, pets are involved. This picture, I'm not sure of its significance, but it came up also and it looks like the road has rain on it, so it made me smile. But that's what I feel like...today is the first day. Today, I am going to eat only what is on my food plan. Today, I am going to start yoga. Today I am going to read by Big Book. Today, I am going to clean out my closet and I'm not going to be impatient with me child. Why? Because today is the first day of the rest of my life. Today I will be kinder and more generous. Today I will EXERCISE!!!! Today, I will meditate and become centered. It's a concept just dripping with optimism. Nothing is outside my grasp...nothing is beyond the realm of possibility. Today is the first day of the rest of my life...today is going to be perfect...

There is my problem. Today is NOT going to be perfect. Today is going to get screwed up, by some idiot on the highway, by some jackass I live with, or...most likely...by me. And once my expectations have not been met, then I will abandon my lofty goals and I will resume my old patterns...many of which are not the best for me. I won't look forward, I'll get bogged down in the past or in the comfortable or in what I'm used to. I'm not going to break out of my comfort zone once I have to face that the first day of the rest of my life was crappy on some level.

So today, just for today, not forever, not for the forseeable future, just for today, I am going to accept that the first day of the rest of my life will be fraught with peril. (What an awesome phrase!) Today, the first day of the rest of my life, I'm going to do SOMETHING better than I did it yesterday. Today I am going to try and do something I didn't do yesterday. Today I am going to make an effort to improve my life a little bit. Today I am going to focus on something I need to get accomplished and work hard to make that happen. Today I am going to thank God for my health, the health of my child, the health of those I love and pray for the world. And when bad things happen, I will make an effort not to blame God. Today, I am going to breath. And I am going to forgive myself. And I am going to live.

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. But you know what? Everyday is the first day of the rest of my life.