Sassy Girl

My 7 year old (McG) just amazes me sometimes. Of course she's perfect and caring and loving and sweet and wonderful (like her mother! HA!) but sometimes, I just have to wonder who this person came from! She loves all animals. She is an animal freak! So we're talking and she announces that when she is a teenager, she'll work in a dog groomers "But I am NOT going to shave dog's butts!" and then she says she wants to be a vet when she grows up, "But I am NOT going to do surgery!" and of course, she's only 7, so these declarations are all well and cute and harmless right now, but I just marvel at this 7 year olds absolute confidence in the fact that life WILL fall in line, exactly as she plans it. She will get what she wants, with the specifications she demands falling into place effortlessly. And this is not an attitude that stems from getting her way all the time. (Unless she's around my mother, she does NOT get her way all the time!). But I have never had that kind of confidence. I look back and think about how I just always felt so lucky IF anything worked out my way. I still feel that way, to a certain extent, although now I'm exuberant and thrilled and very grateful. The hardest part is not knowing what to tell my daughter and really now knowing what I want for her. I would love for her to face none of the disease issues I have. So far, McG seems to have inherited her father's metabolism and the girl is a stick, tall, skinny without so much as a tiny curve I see on some of her friends. I want to make sure she is kind to everyone, regardless of their race, creed, color and especially size. I don't want her to be one of those girls, pretty, popular and horribly mean to those who aren't in her "group". At least 99% of me doesn't. But is it a trade off? Beautiful, popular and a bitch? I hope not. And even if I were to hope she is popular, that is going to fly directly in the face of my firm belief that if you are truly popular in high school, that becomes the high point of your life and its all downhill from there. (I cling to this theory and hope that its true. I want them to suffer! HA!)
My daughter knows I go to meetings to work on my eating. She knows my food plan. I drive her to school and she reads my For Today aloud to me. We just started this, but she enjoys reading and it makes her feel like she is part of my program and that's okay, right? I don't hide my disease or my recovery from anyone and now, it's so ingrained into who I am, it's only right my child should be aware.
I don't know, half the time, what to tell her. She is so firmly aware of her own wants and desires, yet at the same time, with her friends, she appears to be very much a follower. There is always a little girl ready to lead the pack and McG does not appear to be one of them. This has caused me some frustration when said "lead dog" begins to push my child around and McG won't stand up for herself. But ultimately, I tell her, it's her decision who she is friends with (yeah, type THAT again when she's 16!) and if these people are going to act badly towards her, then the only person letting them do that is her. (12 step parenting!)
And what do I tell her in 5 years, if she has suddenly gotten heavy? That I love her anyway, absolutely. Beyond that, I have no idea.
I know McG's heart is kind and very big. She is a good person. I can tell that now. She is a total drama queen, 100% (thank to me Mom and McG's Dad for passing that gene along!), but ultimately, she cares deeply for people and I hope that will sustain her. I hope she gets everything she wants and I hope I can remember that whatever that is, has nothing to do with me.